One and the Same
by KDiMeraFan21
Summary: After Reid is kidnapped and drugged by an unsub, he talks with Elle about how similar they are now. Set after episode 2x15.


**A/N: Hey everyone! I recently rewatched the episode where Reid is kidnapped and drugged by an unsub. I was inspired to write this. Hope y'all love it!**

Elle had called him when she heard the news of his kidnapping. Even though she didn't stop by Quantico or keep up with the gossip all that often, she kept electronic tabs on Reid. He was one of the nicest to her on the team when she worked at the BAU. She actually wanted to know what he was up to.

"You were kidnapped?" she asked in shock. "By an unsub?"

Spencer Reid flinched at the reminder involuntarily. It wasn't a question that Elle Greenaway was asking though. It was a statement despite the inflection in her voice. Apparently the news had traveled fast about what had happened to him.

"Come over," he'd said. "We can talk." Then: "Are you in town?"

She was. Elle was over within twenty minutes, and Reid had been in total awe of her from the moment she arrived. Her hair was long again, and she looked great. She didn't seem as broken as before.

"Hey genius kid," she said. "Long time, no see, huh?"

"Something like that," he replied awkwardly. He showed her to the living room. "Sorry the place is a little messy. The BAU's been busy lately. I haven't had a chance to clean up."

"Don't worry about it," Elle said. "I get it. I still remember my FBI days."

Finally someone who truly understood him and what he had went through. She was just as messed up as he was. Damaged nonetheless. Even if she didn't show it, Reid knew the pain was still there somewhere.

They were sitting on the couch in his living room, each of them on a different end, talking about anything and everything they could think of. The team, the cases, what they had been doing lately. Finally, though, Elle brought up the reason for her visit.

"Tell me," she said softly after a while. "How bad was it? Did he hurt you?"

Reid looked at her, knowing she wouldn't judge him for what he was about to confess. If anyone would understand what he had been through, it was Elle. She had been shot barely a year ago by an unsub in her own home. She knew what it was like to feel violated and used.

He had to get it off his chest.

Reid nodded. "Yeah," he said softly. "It was horrible. It was the worst thing I've ever went through."

There were no other words to describe his experience with Tobias Hankel. Dealing with an unsub was enough, but this particular man suffered from personality disorder. He was three different people at various times.

He closed his eyes, trying to force the memory out of his head. If Elle hadn't been sitting with him, he wouldn't have revisited this. He couldn't have. Reid barely survived the first time around, and it definitely terrified him just to think about it. Elle squeezed his hand in support, knowing how hard it was for him.

"I never knew who was coming through the door," he whispered. "I always hoped it would be Tobias because he was the nicest of the personalities. Whenever it was Charles or Rafael, I thought...that I was going to die."

Elle only looked at Reid a second before she moved down the couch toward him. When she hugged him tightly, he didn't push her away. He welcomed the affection.

"He gave me drugs," he said, slightly muffled into her hair. "I remembered things that I didn't want to. I felt things that I didn't want to. He...he…"

Reid couldn't finish. It had only been a few weeks since the incident had happened, yet it felt like it had happened ten minutes ago. Was time really passing at all? It seemed like he was stuck back in that cabin, needle in his arm, wondering if his death was inevitable.

He had to get outside. He needed fresh air and fast. He felt like he was going to hurl just at the thought of being tied to that chair and back in a room with Tobias.

Reid jumped up. "I need air," he gasped, heading for the french doors. "I'm sorry."

He followed the doors out to his balcony. He grasped the railing and tried to keep himself upright. _Don't think too much about it, _he reminded himself. _You don't want to faint._

"I know how you feel," Elle said softly. She was right behind him. "You're going to get through this though. I promise you that. At least that's what they say anyway."

"Do you actually believe that?" Reid asked, clearing his throat. "You think we can get through this completely one day?"

"Not really," she answered. "These kind of things scar you. They leave you changed. There's no way you can go back to what you used to be."

A silence fell between them. They stared up at the moon, wishing for anything that their scars could fade away and they could forget everything that had happened in the last year. If only the night could heal them.

"You know what Morgan told me the other day?" Reid said suddenly. "That I could feel empathy for our victims now, and it could help us with finding them."

"Really?

"Yeah," he said. "I don't see how though. I'm still at the cabin. I'm still with Tobias. I'm not the person I used to be before. He's still there. He's still waiting for the team to come rescue him."

The words hung in the air, making it hard to breathe or think. Elle was quick to respond: "I'm still there too. I'm playing Garner's game," she whispered. "I've changed. I'm still trying to sleep after that long vacation. I'm still worrying how that man got all of those pictures of us…" Her voice trailed off.

"What do we do?"

"We...we just need to find a way to accept it, you know?" Elle said. "Randall and Tobias changed us, but they don't have to take our happiness too."

Reid looked at her, knowing she was right. Completely right. They needed to move on. It wasn't like she could play Garner's game forever or that he could stay at the cabin. They needed to get on with things and find something else, anything else, to fixate themselves on.

He was the first one to speak: "I'm glad you called. I needed this," he said. "It feels better to talk about it, especially with someone who understands it."

"I'm glad I called too," Elle said. "Now we both know that there's someone out there to talk to."

Reid pulled her into his arms then. Elle wasn't someone to let her vulnerability show, yet here it was evident on her face. Her eyes were practically screaming for help. She was hurting too.

"We'll get through this," he whispered. "I won't let anyone hurt you again."

They stood there, embraced on Reid's balcony, for a long while afterward. They weren't aware of time passing. They were more focused on the other's touch than the situations they had found themselves in before.

Suddenly he kissed her. Reid half expected Elle to shove him away in disgust. After all, she had always flirted with Morgan and not him. Was he even her type?

She didn't break the kiss. As soon as their lips touched, she pulled herself as close to him as humanly possible. She felt safer in his arms.

As long as they had each other, they would be alright again.

**A/N: Reviews, anyone?**


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